We need more conflicts

Do I want more conflicts in my life? – NO. Of course NO. But, do I think conflicts have made me a better person? – Yes. And I think we have been trying to avoid conflicts to our best ability that we may have lost the crucial skill to mediate and deal with conflicts in our life. Think about the last time you may have disagree with someone – did you talk it over or just let it slip through?. I think we (and the society) could perhaps benefit more by addressing conflicts, rather than just try to stay peaceful and cover conflicts under the carpet. Addressing conflicts and sharing our emotions along the way may actually be the most effective way to maintain peace.

This proposition is partly influenced by a chapter (or section) from the new book by Adam Grant “Think Again: The Power of Knowing What You Don’t Know”. In the book, Adam proposed that instead of avoiding conflicts and “agree to disagree”, we should actually find meaningful ways to resolve the conflicts.

After reading it, I start to recall a number of examples from my past personal or second hand experience. Building upon his suggestions, I think (hypothesize?) we actually may have lost the ability to deal with conflicts productively. Because mediating conflicts effectively requires ‘soft interpersonal skills’ like negotiations. And it takes time to build/sharpen these skills. More importantly, it’s more of a collective action, rather than individual change. We need conflicts and need to learn how to deal with them effectivel, as a community!

To be added: Get a slide deck on negotiation from my colleague. Think of more examples. Re-read the chapter again.
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I have a folder in my phone where I noted down all my (unfinished) ideas. I find talking about/bouncing my ideas off with others help me understand the problem better. So, I’ll defy my hesitancy to share only just polished version of thoughts, and rather share the ‘ongoing’ thoughts, as an invitation for whoever comes across my posts, to share what you think with me! Please reach out via any channel of your choice – see the left panel :)

category: thoughts 
tag: socialscience  relationship  thoughtsinprogress  draft 

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